Tuxedo Belldandy and Lovely Warrior Keiichi
by Balthanon
Summary: Power beyond the ken of mortal man... or immortal senshi; this is what the Gates of Space and Time represent and none can attest to this better than the Norns. Time has been sundered and the final end of things averted by the narrowest of margins. In the aftermath, however, a certain goddess' attempt to be a bit more proactive triggers a fate she and her sisters didn't weave...


Author's Note: This was originally posted on the Anime Addventure and as a result has a somewhat silly premise as an underlying assumption. The idea that it prompted amused me though, so I ended up writing a several posts there. I've taken that and cleaned it up a bit here to eventually continue.

* * *

Keiichi sighed as he glanced over the small apartment he shared with his sister. He loved her and all, but frankly she was really a pig. He picked up a comic from a pile sitting in the corner next to a comfortable, if well-worn, chair and absently read the title aloud.

"Pretty Princess Miyu."

Why had she left these sitting out? Heck, why did she even own these? They didn't seem the type of comic his sister would normally read. Curious, he flipped one open to the first page and started reading. A few minutes later he absently brushed the stale cookie crumbs off of the chair and sat down, engrossed in the tales of Miyu and her fight against the Forces of Darkness, made possible by the aid of her hidden protector and love interest, the Bishonen Baron.

After a few hours of reading, the gnawing of his stomach reminded Keiichi that he hadn't eaten and he guiltily set the current comic down on the pile and stood up. Heading over to the fridge, he thought about the comics as he rifled through the empty jars, take-out boxes, and condiment containers that were all that was left of the food in the house.

The relationship between Miyu and the Baron had just kind of come together it seemed, almost effortlessly on their parts. Oh sure, there had been some token fighting between the two early on, but all in all it seemed to smooth out quickly enough. It wasn't anything like real life relationships seemed to work out. With Sayoko, it seemed like every time things had calmed down into a routine something he did upset her and they were right back to ground zero again.

His thoughts broke off abruptly as he gave up on finding food somewhere in the house.

"Looks like it's going to be takeout again." He sighed and went to get the phone book, quickly flipping to a well worn page and running his finger down the list of restaurants. The phone rested easily on his shoulder and he started dialing up various numbers.

"Sorry, we don't... Too late to deliver, bud... That far? I don't think so... We no longer deliver..."

Sighing to himself, he went to pull his keys out, then recalled he had lent his motorcycle to Megumi for the night. Well, one more attempt at a restaurant, then he would walk down to the nearest. It would take nearly a half an hour, but he was starving. Hopefully it wouldn't come to that.

Flipping the page, he glanced at the number and dialed quickly, his growling stomach making his actions rushed.

"Goddess Relief Office, you've reached the Goddess Helpline. One moment please, and we shall send a representative for a consultation."

Keiichi pulled the phone away from his ear and stared at it in surprise. "Hello? Hello? I think I called a wrong number. Hello?" Setting the phone down with a click after getting no answer he got to his feet. "Oh well, might as well get going."

"Oh, where are you going?"

Slowly turning his head, he stared at the head and shoulders of the beautiful woman halfway out of the mirror in the hallway. Frozen, he just stood there as she pulled herself the rest of the way out.

A smile on her lips, the strange woman bobbed her head and said, "I am Belldandy, Goddess First Class, Unlimited, and I'm here to help you."

ooo

Though she didn't show it, Belldandy was rather upset. More than upset really, and it was all that... woman's... fault. Involuntarily, she found herself digging her nails into her palms as the memory flooded back up into her mind.

* * *

"AAARRRGGGHHHH!" Setsuna screamed, her voice nearly breaking as she dropped to her knees. "I can't FIX it! It's not right, no matter how many times I try!"

The errant Senshi of Time turned her attention back to the gate again, the potent device skimming over the key individuals she was trying to once again empower. Unfortunately, it just wasn't sticking- no matter what she did, they couldn't seem to hold their Senshi abilities and she had finally given up.

Her latest attempt had looked for women of power who might be manipulated into taking up the burden of the Senshi instead, preferably kind, generous, and caring like the girls had been. She had found three women that practically radiated power, and, while they had their faults, all the indicators seemed to be positive for their assumption of the Senshi's abilities.

Now all she needed was a catalyst, something to anchor the Senshi's abilities to the appropriate candidates. She couldn't read their lives very accurately, as something was blurring portions of it out, but there was a point just after the first arrived... that should work. With a motion she directed the Time Stream with a deft touch, carefully shifting until... until... she lost them.

She blinked and looked again, and... they were gone. Her eyes widened and her hand immediately shot for the lever that would wipe the timeline, only to freeze as a tired voice rang out from behind her.

"STOP! Step away from that device, Setsuna."

Turning slowly, Setsuna took in the three women who were in a place they couldn't possibly have entered. All had long hair that might once have been lustrous but now hung limply down their backs. The youngest of the three, with somewhat matted black hair looked the best of the three, but even she was haggard. The oldest, possessed of platinum hair that looked as if it were once well cared for and scarcely older than Setsuna herself appeared, looked as if she had been dragged from her grave, beaten, and propped up on the staff she was clutching. The middle sister, for now that she looked, it seemed clear they were related, though she couldn't say what prompted the conclusion, was somewhat between the other two in nearly all manners, with brown hair that tended towards blonde pushed haphazardly over one shoulder.

It was this sister who held Sailor Pluto's attention, however, for despite her evident fatigue, a fire flickered warningly in her eyes. "Setsuna Meioh, Sailor Pluto, Favored of Hel and wielder of the Garnet Staff. Your actions until now have been without consequence, a result of foreknowledge, rather than force. With the activation of the Gate, you have done... You have..." The young woman choked, then tilted her head up, tears sparkling in the corners of her eyes. "What you have done is unforgivable. We, the Three Norns, Goddesses of Past, Present, and Future, judge thee. For thy actions are ye banished, never again to lay your hand upon the strings of Fate or sail the seas of Time. We cannot repeal the favor of Hel, but despite all the days you wander Midgaard, never more shall your actions affect the course of history in Past, Present, or Future."

Setsuna narrowed her eyes as the last pronouncement rang out, the child echoing the word "Future", the oldest the word "Past", and the middle sister the word "Present", despite having been the one to speak it in the first place. As the echo of the words faded from the chamber, the three women began chanting, moving in a slow circle around Setsuna. As the first thoughts of escape began to run through her head, a crystalline structure of runes began to build around her and the Gate began to recede, eventually coming to rest beside the "Goddess of the Present".

After that, things began to blur, the runes surrounding her pulsing with a rhythm just beyond her ability to comprehend. As the world began to fade, Setsuna wondered what effect her last actions would have and then the blackness closed in...

ooo

Their task finally finished, Belldandy dropped to her knees beside the Gate, her head resting against the frame as tears spilled down her cheeks. "Oh, Keiichi. What am I going to do without you..."

Skuld and Urd stood back, uncomfortable and knowing there was nothing they could do to comfort their sister. Nothing but time, of the more mundane sort, would heal her wounds.

It was Skuld who was the first to notice the swirling motion of the Time Gate and recognize the face that was prominent in many of the scenes whirling through it in response to Belldandy's thoughts. "Bell! Look!"

Belldandy raised her head, startled and looked back at her sister, then towards the the Gate she was pointing towards. "KEIICHI!" Within moments, Belldandy was on her feet, her hands pressed against the Gate, ripples of energy emanating out from her palms.

* * *

Belldandy forcibly uncurled her hands and turned a sweet smile on Keiichi. She was meeting him far later in this time line, but she wasn't going to give up. Especially not to Sayoko.

"Uhhh, you're here to what?" Keiichi asked, that bewildered look he got sometimes crossing his face. It made her want to reach out and hug him, but she restrained herself.

Belldandy responded, "I'm here to help you. I can grant you any one thing you wish, but only one." She clasped her hands in front of herself. "Whatever you might desire." Some advice from Urd flashed into her thoughts and, with a faint blush, she inhaled deeply, her eyes tracking Keiichi's as they shifted down.

"So, I can wish for... well, anything? Cars, money, love?" His voice was slightly wistful as he mentioned the last, and Belldandy's hopes rose. She didn't notice as his glance shifted over to the pile of comics on the opposite side of the room.

"All of those are easily done, Keiichi-san. Anything you might desire."

Lowering his head, Keiichi paused for nearly a minute before raising his head finally, his expression firm and his thoughts traveling almost too quickly for her to pick up, though she knew the Ultimate Force would have no such trouble. "I wish I had a life full of heroism and love, danger and romance, and a girl who would love me for who I am underneath all the masks we wear in life."

Belldandy had little time to think about the thoughts passing through Keiichi's mind as the Ultimate Force seized her, a brilliant white glow suffusing the entire room as an azure beam shot up through the roof into the sky. The only thought on her mind was wrestling with the sea of energy that was running through her, scrambling for some part of it, some part of Keiichi's life that she could claim for herself. This was as forbidden as anything she had ever done before, but she had to do it. Her desperation masked the oddities within this wish, so that even as she seized onto one of its aspects, she failed to perceive the changes that were wrought by an energy she had quite recently encountered.

As the light finally faded from the room, Belldandy was somewhat surprised to notice in the mirror that she was wearing an oddly alluring half-tuxedo, complete with top hat and mask. Upon turning to Keiichi, she received an even greater shock, however, for Keiichi, her beloved Keiichi, was... well, a girl. She rubbed her eyes, then looked again to make sure she wasn't seeing things. Unfortunately, the outfit that Keiichi was now wearing left little to the imagination, and doubt about her beloveds current gender was hard to come by with the dark blue skirt, tight white bodice, and rather large red bows.

"What happe-" Keiichi started, then clasped her hands over her mouth. A moment later her eyes drifted down to the white gloves covering her hands, and, as she removed them from her mouth, further down to the breasts quite evident just below.

Stuttering slightly, Belldandy said, "Keiichi, you... you're a..." She paused, then calmed herself, asking in as even a tone as she could, "when did you decide you wanted to be a woman, Keiichi?" Her thoughts were racing despite her best attempt to be calm and confusion seized her. Had Keiichi wanted to be a girl even when she had been with him? How could she and... she be together now! This was just too much, she needed to talk to someone, someone like... URD! Urd would know what to do, or at least she would pretend to know, which in her state of mind would almost be enough.

Keiichi's mouth worked for a moment and she managed only to mouth the word "woman" once, then fainted abruptly, the long glaive with the crescent moon blade clattering to the ground beside her.

Carefully slipping an arm under Keiichi, Belldandy eased the rather light girl up into her arms and carried her over to a chair, where she set her down. She watched the girl breath for a minute, and then took several steps backwards. "What am I going to do, Keiichi? How can we...?" Shaking her head, she turned and fled for the mirror in the hall, diving through and orienting as best she could in her confused state on Urd.

Had she stayed for a few more minutes, however, she would have noticed the glaive left lying upon the floor slowly fade away and Keiichi's features and clothing slowly shift back to normal.

ooo

Belldandy burst from the mirror closest to Urd, which should have been in a nearly ten foot high ceiling above her bed, and promptly tripped over the sink just below her feet. Her reaction just barely spared her a dunking in the rather large, heart shaped tub full of bubbles on the opposite side of the room and she touched down rather shakily on the royal blue bath mat in front of it.

"Urd?" she called, taking in the rich, almost ostentatious, surroundings. The fact that it didn't quite hit gaudy told her that she wasn't in Urd's chambers in Heaven.

"I'm in here!" a rusty voice responded, trailing off in a sighing cough.

Following the sound, Belldandy stepped out into a brilliantly appointed bedroom, decorated in the same royal blue as the bath mat she had been standing upon. This room had little of the gold that had predominated in the bathing chamber, but it had its own share of rich accoutrements.

Looking around, she spotted Urd lying upon a bed, festooned in quilts and with half a bottle of sake sitting on the dark oak table beside her. Making her way over to her sister, she sat down on the edge and looked down at her. "You're looking much better today, Urd."

Urd cracked a half-hearted smile in return and croaked, "Liar."

A light smile touched Belldandy's lips. "Only a little. Still not feeling better I see?"

Her sister shook her head, then said, "I would feel a lot better if I could stomach more than a glass or two of sake at a time." Her voice died out in a cough, and she shook slightly, prompting Belldandy to tuck her blankets around her more closely.

"If it were a simple matter of lost energy, I'm sure you would already be back on your feet, Urd."

The Goddess of the Past shrugged in response, then gave her sister a rakish grin. "I didn't mean for the energy, Bell."

Shaking her head, Belldandy turned her attention back to the room briefly. "What did you do to your rooms anyway, Urd? It looks nice."

Her sister shook her head slightly, then looked Belldandy up and down for a minute, taking in the somewhat tousled hair and clothes that were on the wrong side of perfect. "You're really out of it, aren't you," she said in a hoarse voice, "we're on Midgaard and I am officially on sick leave. Or rather, an 'indefinite vacation', as Kami-sama put it. Rest and relaxation for as long as I need to recover."

Belldandy started and then began to rise. "Oh, I shouldn't be here then, I should hav-" She glanced down to the hand that was latched onto her wrist with surprising strength, startled silent.

"NO! I mean," Urd said quickly, "I'm going to go nuts if I have any more 'relaxation'. I can't get out of bed and I don't get many visitors while the mess that woman caused in Yggdrasil is being fixed." She lapsed silent for a moment, catching her breath, then pulled a lock of hair behind one ear and continued. "Tell me what you've been doing. How goes the bug hunting?"

A blush quickly rose upon the middle sister's cheeks and she glanced around furtively. "Well, the truth is, that's why I came here, I'm not really bug hunting anymore. I was assigned to the Goddess Relief Office as light duty, since I'm not completely recovered myself." She turned to look around again, then leaned towards her sister, her voice rising slightly, an odd mix of excitement and dread entering her eyes. "Urd, I've talked to Keiichi! I got his wish!"

Her older sister sat up abruptly, throwing off one of the navy blue quilts that covered her and smiled at Belldandy. "You didn't! Did he make the same wish again? I'll move in right away, this place is Dullsville anyway, I'm sure Kami-sama won't mind..." She trailed off as she noticed the look on her sister's face as she shook her head.

"Oh, Urd, he's a girl!" And with that, Belldandy burst into tears and collapsed onto her sister's lap.

ooo

Urd listened carefully. She comforted Belldandy in all the right places and she applauded her daring and gave her the tacit approval she was looking for. And, when the subject that interrupted the conversation in such a dramatic way earlier came up again, she said, "Who cares?"

Belldandy's mouth opened, but nothing came out, so she shut it again. Urd waited, and it opened again, only to close without a sound. She really looked quite silly in Urd's opinion.

"Well? You love Keiichi, don't you, Bell?"

"Of course I do!" she responded fiercely, her eyes flaring with much the same determination that had kept the three Goddesses going during the long period of instability.

Urd smiled, the expression alleviating some of the weariness that rested behind her eyes. "Well, then what does it really matter if Keiichi is a girl? He, or she, is the same person where it really counts-" She reached out and rested her finger on the center of Belldandy's chest. "-in here."

Belldandy looked down, her hands playing with the quilt, and generally looking much more the unsure, younger sister Urd remembered from a few years back than the calm, collected woman she had matured into. "This will be good for her," Urd thought, "one way or another."

"What if he... doesn't want me, though?" Belldandy finally asked, her voice carefully controlled and her bangs masking her eyes. "I mean, it's not assured, I don't even know... I don't know if I even met him in this timeline."

Urd raised her hand again and carefully brushed aside the bangs hiding Belldandy's eyes. The blue depths shimmered with unshed tears as she looked up and Urd couldn't find it in herself to confirm them.

"Look at it this way, Bell," Urd finally said, "Keiichi wanted love and romance, right? And he wanted _you_ to be part of that, otherwise you wouldn't have been affected by the wish." A flash of guilt crossed Belldandy's face, and as she turned away, Urd wondered what her sister hadn't told her. It didn't matter right now though. "What I think, is that Keiichi, consciously or not, wants to be the prey, rather than the hunter."

This startled Belldandy enough that she turned back to Urd, her expression saying as much as her words. "Prey? What are you talking about, Urd?"

The older goddess grinned at her sister, a little, self-satisfied smirk that should have warned her away. "You, my dear sister, are going to need to be considerably more aggressive than you have in the past. This Keiichi wants to be won and wooed, courted and showered with attentions till he's so bedazzled he won't know what hit him! Err, her... whatever."

"But... I don't know how to do that." Belldandy looked a bit bedazzled herself, she might have to take this a bit more slowly.

Urd put her hand on Belldandy's as she nodded to herself. "That, is where I come in. You keep me filled in and I'll give you all the advice you need." She flipped her platinum hair over her shoulder, feeling a hundred percent better already. This was just what she needed, a project to keep her spirits up while her body recovered.

Her sister was looking a bit dubious still, though, so she dispensed her first advice. "First things first, why don't you go to Heaven and check on exactly what the wish did?" Urd nodded towards the bathroom and lowered herself into a prone position again. She was getting a bit tired after all this excitement. "If we know that, we can see where to go from there."

Belldandy gave her a brilliant smile and stood up from the bed, abruptly composed again. "And you can get some rest." She pulled the quilt up over Urd's shoulder and made sure she was comfortable, then leaned down. "Thank you, Urd," she whispered, "I don't know what I would do without you."

The "Goddess of Love" just smiled back and squeezed her sister's hand, fighting to keep her eyes open while Belldandy was still in the room and succeeding by only the slightest margin.

ooo

Belldandy stared at the mirror in disbelief and read the message one more time.

 _Goddess First Class, Unlimited, Belldandy._

 _For your recent actions in regards to the mortal Keiichi Morisato's wish, you are being placed on probation. You have been removed from the rolls of the Goddess Relief Office for the duration and are hereby confined to the plane of Midgaard._

 _Your case will be reviewed one year from today in the Seventh Ring Thirty-Seventh District Court. We will expect you at precisely ten o'clock in the morning. You may seek counsel at that time to represent your actions to Kami-sama or do so yourself._

 _As this is only your second offense of note, and the first having been adjudged to have been under duress, your first class and unlimited status will not be revoked unless the DDA finds due cause in your behavior on Midgaard._

 _D.D.A. [Divine Discipline Agency]_

"I'm... I'm..." Belldandy took a step backwards and sat with an abrupt motion, her bottom meeting the marble of the bath with a heavy thud. Wincing, she rubbed it surreptiously and continued to stare at the mist shrouded mirror in which the message was incribed.

She wasn't sure whether she was relieved or not that Kami-sama apparently didn't know about her transgression yet at least. The DDA was generally considered to have a rather... strict interpretation of the rules, but she wasn't sure what else might have been done. She didn't really have any defense for her actions.

At least they had left her her powers, so she could protect Keiichi if needed. Of course... she had also heard that the DDA was fond of leaving their defendents just enough rope to hang themselves with, so... perhaps she should restrain herself. Then again, what if they decided that she had been left her license for a reason and by ignoring it she was harming her chances of being fully reinstated. It was all just confusing...

Absently standing up, she wandered out into the bedroom in a daze, her feet taking her to Urd's bedside, where she dropped down to her knees near the head. Whispering, she said, "Urd? Urd, are you awake?" Barely restraining herself from shaking her sister, she sighed when all she got out of the woman was a snore. She wasn't going to wake her up just for... well, the end of her life, she supposed.

She shook her head. She had to stop being so melodramatic, this was just a probation, it could go either way. In the mean time, she would behave and... well, she wasn't sure what she would do on Midgaard, though she knew it would center around Keiichi. At any rate, for the time being, she would wait on Urd waking up and then talk it over with her. Urd had been on probation plenty of times, she would know what was expected of a Goddess in exile.

Having decided that, she stood up and looked around the extravegent room again. It would take her only a short time to put together a meal for Urd when she woke up. Preferably something that could simmer for as long as needed, but she needed to find the kitchen first and so set off to do that.

The kitchen, much like the rest of the suite, was large and well appointed with a deep basin sink, an elaborate stove and oven, and a walk-in freezer, refrigerator and pantry, all save the pantry in stainless steel with gold trim. The oak found in the bedroom was replicated in the cupboards and the same marble found in the bathroom offset that nicely in the countertops. She left the ingredients she was sure weren't in the engraved cupboards till last and walked into the pantry to fetch some noodles.

Upon walking out, however, she was more than a bit surprised to find a slim package sitting on the counter near where she had left the food. Looking around the room and not spotting anyone, she picked up the card attached and opened it with a small amount of trepidation:

 _Big Sister,_

 _I believe in you and I'll get to the bottom of this before those dumb DDA people can do anything else stupid. Imagine, treating you as if you were a common criminal like Urd! I'll take care of everything, don't worry about a thing!_

 _Love, Skuld_

 _P.S. I thought you might need something to do while you're stuck on boring, old Midgaard, so I sent you a limited-access Yggdrasil terminal. Have fun!_

Smiling, Belldandy began cooking in a much lighter mood than she had started, humming an old tune and weaving slightly as she chopped, baked, and boiled.


End file.
